You are most welcome...Friday Funnies coming out tonight...was just about ready to load em up!

Oh now ... a good many of these were spot on . . .
Did I just interrupt you ? Ah, a random bit of recall plus a dose of excitement.
Thank you Carl.

Carl, you make my week ;-)

Milking sheep.
Did you bring the money
With your backup lights on
* Hello, you're on the air
The best of the best, thanks

Now I can be politically correct and be a trans something. Thanks for the Friday laughs.

Laughing...I live for publishing it!

I'll have to remember that phone answer. I've been using "Rex Little's Bra and Girl. . . uh, Bar and Grill. What can I do you out of?" for years, and it's time for a change.

Gotta love a little bit of real life you can laugh at! Thanks UOC!

I live for the Friday funnies!

Lmao. never thought i’d +1 something like that.

I'd ask them if the pony ride is for a Gender Reveal party or a gay wedding...

Telemarketers? Because we do pony rides we might get calls from anyone, so we cannot restrict ourselves to "known" phone numbers. When I find I'm talking to a telemarketer I immediately ask whether the pony ride will be for a birthday party or for a church festival. They hang up.

Laughing...

Try: Do You Poop alot, then Flush a lot, repeat
A, A, Oh, you got to go, you sit on the toilet bowl.
You squint and fart, fart, wiggle and shout, shout,
now there's floaters on the floor
cause you use too much TP!
You dodge and you weave your way out the door, cause you left poop on the floor.
Do you poop alot then flush alot...
Do you poop a lot, then flush alot...

Don't remember it all now...but you'll crack up when you hear the song.

Wanted to record the song and have it play when someone in peculiar sits on the mens toilet bowl at Hospice.

Great batch!!

The extra long dipsticks are usually in the same aisle as the muffler bearings. It’s lucky that you don’t need carburetor chains: I don’t think they make them anymore…

You're welcome, OUC. Good luck with the job hunting.

Hey, don't feel alone here. I play music in my head all the time when I'm doing stuff. Duh-oh, I'll be doing your vaccination chant today! LOL

Thanks needed these laughs ...

Now I’m rolling on the floor literally lmao. I knew you would get it and I , surprise surprise do that too. “In the garden of Eden honey”

Instead of

In a gadda da vida, honey
Don't you know that I'm lovin' you
In a gadda da vida, baby
Don't you know that I'll always be true

What the hell is ....in a qada da vida? Lol

Ha I just looked it up. Thanks Internet this is what it said
Actually In-a-gadda-da-vida translates "In the garden of life"; not eden! Like the fricking Internet is reading my comment while typing.

Laughing, changing to tune can take one into a better place. I get a song repeating in my head too every now and then, I like to change the words to what it sounds like they are singing, not what they actually are singing...catch my self laughing out loud!
Sometimes the brain goes silent but the Mind just doesn't sleep....Try Tying a yellow RIVER around the old soaked tree and take it from there...

Right now we live in the brutal world of a matrix.
Personally this mandate bullshit is the tipping point. The point from compliance to f🇺🇸ck off, if that’s what you reQuire of me to WORK for you? There is no value for value in these scenarios as far as i’m Concerned I . As you might know I am afflicted with a very controlled PTSD. One of the after effects is that I renumerate songs in my head , more or less 24/7/365 . I have learned how to change the tune somewhat , and thankfully hahaha imagine “tie a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree” over and over. Anyway the current hit song running through my head is from the recent rally in London ( I always liked the British rockers) where thousands sang in unison ... “you can shove the vaccination up your ass, ohh you can shove the vaccination up your ass, you can shove the vaccination you can shove the vaccination the can shove the vaccination up your ass”. Lmao

Thanks Brother.
Because I've taken this step, which I knew it would come down too, I could have faked it, I have the tech but, I decided to leave the outcome to a higher source for once in my life.

I have a lot of confidence things will workout.

I liked the second one too. Can't believe that these applications ask: How do you identify and which race are you...I'd love to write in: What ever race and gender gets me the Job!
I filled out a app for the ACE Hardware in town, thought it would be a nice retirement job but couldn't convey my vast experiences relating to hardware, power tools etc, sales and merchandising, so I stopped in and gave them my resume...believe it or not, they were tickled pink!...hope it's a good sign.

Well. The first one is timely and priceless. Good luck brother.