Sunday Funnies
I used to believe that aging is all in the mind. Which explains why brains are so wrinkled. In my youth, I was the picture of health and very physically fit.
These days my joints noisily creak and grind whenever I move. A sinus condition causes snoring loud enough to wake my neighbors.And, my stomach rumbles like a cement mixer.
I've gone from a sound body to a Sound body.
These days my joints noisily creak and grind whenever I move. A sinus condition causes snoring loud enough to wake my neighbors.And, my stomach rumbles like a cement mixer.
I've gone from a sound body to a Sound body.
The trouble with a parallel you in another universe is that you only can live in one of them, so make the best of this one.
Yep, 18 or 19, somewhere in that paralell existence.
Back in my day, there wasn't a pretty girl I couldn't Woo! They'd always come a runnin when I smiled...now days, they're still a runnin...AWAY!
I still do all the things I used to, just not as quickly,
But smarter now with no wasted movements and
I feel ok, I don't need those improvements,
It's just the outer shell that's lookin icky.
The 80-year-old said, "The best thing that could happen to me would just to be able to have a good pee. I stand there for 20 minutes, and it just dribbles and hurts. I have to go over and over again."
The 85-year-old said, "The best thing that could happen to me is if I could have one good bowel movement. I take every kind of laxative I can get my hands on and I still have problems."
Then the 90-year-old said, "That's not my problem. Every morning, at 6 a.m. sharp, I have a good long pee. And at 6:30 a.m. sharp, I have a great bowel movement. The best thing that could happen to me would be if I could wake up before 7 a.m!"
After you've made your mark in this world, a lot of people will come around with erasures.
Health without wealth is also a sickness.
Creditors have better memories than debtors.
When your dreams turn to dust; Vacuum.