Helping the FBI

Posted by strugatsky 8 years, 10 months ago to Politics
32 comments | Share | Best of... | Flag

The FBI seems to be having trouble identifying terrorism/work-place violence/street-side violence and how to deal with it. I have thought hard and long, and have developed a program that will resolve all those problems:

TASK - Help FBI determine the reasons for Muhammad Youssef Abdulazeez
killing 4 Marines and injuring 3 others in TN.

1. Poverty – Middle class by US standards, very well to do by the rest of the world
standards. Recommended action – tax him and others like him into poverty so that
they will fit the expected profile.

2. Lack of education – Graduated from U. of TN with a degree in engineering.
Recommended action – Lower the education standards further to make sure that
others like him fit the expected profile.

3. Racism and racial bias against people from Arab countries.
Recommended action – Bring more people into the US from Arab countries.

4. Religious alienation – Since Muslims are discriminated against in the US, more
Muslim outreach programs are needed.
Recommended action – July should be designated as Muslim Pride month, right/left
after LGBT Pride month of June, to keep the momentum flowing.

5. Malnutrition – Specifically, trace amounts of pork.
Recommended action – Pork has already been banned at the White House and in
school lunches. It needs to be eliminated completely. Need a government-funded
study to create pork-free pork rinds.

6. GUNS!
Recommended action – Arrest, prosecute and convict all guns. Except for those in the
hands of the KGB Homeland Security, police and other government-sponsored criminals.


All Comments

  • Posted by 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    After two decades of subjective non-thinking (remember, it was Bush who labeled Islam as "the religion of peace") and weeding out anyone capable of thinking, what do you think is left there?
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  • Posted by $ blarman 8 years, 10 months ago
    Your assumption, however, is that the FBI is allowed to operate objectively. As we have seen with this President, however, all law-enforcement is to be handled _sub_jectively with certain ideological constraints placed on investigation and even prejudices built in to the outcomes.
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  • Posted by $ Olduglycarl 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    What most do not realize yet is what has pervaded the paradigm for the past 8000 years is a Kakistocracy...governed by the worst and or the least qualified in society.
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  • Posted by 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    I no longer consider old standards and morals of importance. Do what you need to survive, but do all you can not to enrich the government or anything associated with it. That is, in fact, my patriotic duty now.
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  • Posted by 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Although it is debatable whether our votes matter or not, it is undeniable that millions get excited about candidates that represent nothing more than incompetence at best, if not pure evil. What kind of mental deficiency makes them do that? Are they really that stupid and devious at the same time to believe that Hussein or Hillary will steal more and give them some?

    I work for the DoD and know that most people there realize that we are destroying ourselves. Yet the management invariably follows all orders from Washington to cause the self-destruction and the rank and file quietly submit. This is marching in-step into an abyss.
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  • Posted by $ Olduglycarl 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    I used to think as you do now but soon realized that many are just making their way through life, which has gotten a lot more difficult; but they are aware, just not engaged, it's too painful, they must concentrate on family. I get that, I respect that. Not everyone is willing to stick their necks out. I think if push comes to shove, they'll surprise us. I meet at least 1000 people a week and we talk in passing...they know how bad it is. I don't mind sticking up for them, I lived there once but I am a rebel at heart and never listened to rulers but chose mentors. I chose to write about stupid and make self evident suggestions based upon my research and integrations. If push comes to shove the vast majority Will come together in community and consensus, I am sure of that now.
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  • Posted by Mamaemma 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    There are millions of moochers and looters. And the government is making it so that a large percentage of working Americans can no longer survive without handouts, thereby making them into involuntary moochers. And us producers just have to work harder for less
    Edit:sp
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  • Posted by 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Yes; and I am amazed in general how people are ignoring his clear and unambiguous statements about their own destruction. The stupidity of his followers is mind boggling. I refuse to believe that none of them have brains, which leaves one to think that there are millions of people here who truly hate their country.
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  • Posted by $ allosaur 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    That's true of my stepson with a kidney transplant.
    There's some related medication he always has to take that will go haywire should he consume any grapefruit product, including my favorite soft drink, Fresca.
    Reply | Permalink  
  • Posted by $ jlc 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Be aware that grapefruit juice alters the function of some medications - prolongs them.

    Jan
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  • Posted by wmiranda 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    I do remember that very clearly. The media was slobbering over him but they glossed over the comment.
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  • Posted by 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Remember, our Dear Leader did say that an imam's call to prayer was "the most beautiful music that he has ever heard."
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  • Posted by 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Actually, they are the same. Only one did a little bit of damage to the country, while the other one continues to destroy it daily.
    Reply | Permalink  
  • Posted by wiggys 8 years, 10 months ago
    all they need to know is that he was a arab and a muslim.. but that would be the same for 0-
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  • Posted by Herb7734 8 years, 10 months ago
    In order to be PC, our FBI and CIA go around acting like a bunch of dunderheads. I think that one or both of them should be designated as "The P.C. Police" and stop this sham of them pretending to be the FBI or CIA. It has been reported that J. Edgar Hoover was spinning in his grave so fast the friction set his tomb on fire.
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  • Posted by $ allosaur 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    At home? Ruby Red grapefruit juice.
    I once read that OJ is more fattening.
    If I'm traveling and OJ is all there is in the morning, I'll drink it.
    Reply | Permalink  
  • Posted by Riftsrunner 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    My sentiments exactly. I believe Tina Fey may have put her finger on one of the problems with today's SNL. According to her book the writers there are extremely lazy. So much so that they do even like to go to the bathroom and collect their waste in jars at their desks. I assume that if they can get away with that behavior, there really is no need to be innovative with their comedy sketches. But maybe they are just ahead of the curve, and if we keep down this road, the government will have us all living in our waste and not care one whit for quality in our performance.
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  • Posted by $ allosaur 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    That was very funny to this Alabama football fan.
    Tennessee has become a big a rival as Auburn.
    A color they share? Orange.
    I refuse to wear orange or own an orange car.
    Heck, I would not have an orange car if Tennessee did not exist.
    Auburn's other color, blue, makes no difference to me all by itself or combined with any color save orange.
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  • Posted by wmiranda 8 years, 10 months ago
    We wouldn't have this problem if we converted to Islam or paid the jizya tax for not converting, and put in office someone with a Muslim background sympathetic to Muslims. Oh... we already did some of that, didn't we?
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  • Posted by freedomforall 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Great, thanks!
    So reminicent of the SNL of the 70s. Alas they are no more, having been retired by drug overdoses, cancer, old age, hollywood success, and socialist madness.
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  • Posted by 8 years, 10 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Yes! Thank you! I've looking all over for it. How could I ever think that progressive SNL could ever do anything like that?
    Reply | Permalink  

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