Helping the FBI

Posted by strugatsky 7 years ago to Politics
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The FBI seems to be having trouble identifying terrorism/work-place violence/street-side violence and how to deal with it. I have thought hard and long, and have developed a program that will resolve all those problems:

TASK - Help FBI determine the reasons for Muhammad Youssef Abdulazeez
killing 4 Marines and injuring 3 others in TN.

1. Poverty – Middle class by US standards, very well to do by the rest of the world
standards. Recommended action – tax him and others like him into poverty so that
they will fit the expected profile.

2. Lack of education – Graduated from U. of TN with a degree in engineering.
Recommended action – Lower the education standards further to make sure that
others like him fit the expected profile.

3. Racism and racial bias against people from Arab countries.
Recommended action – Bring more people into the US from Arab countries.

4. Religious alienation – Since Muslims are discriminated against in the US, more
Muslim outreach programs are needed.
Recommended action – July should be designated as Muslim Pride month, right/left
after LGBT Pride month of June, to keep the momentum flowing.

5. Malnutrition – Specifically, trace amounts of pork.
Recommended action – Pork has already been banned at the White House and in
school lunches. It needs to be eliminated completely. Need a government-funded
study to create pork-free pork rinds.

6. GUNS!
Recommended action – Arrest, prosecute and convict all guns. Except for those in the
hands of the KGB Homeland Security, police and other government-sponsored criminals.


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  • Posted by wmiranda 7 years ago
    We wouldn't have this problem if we converted to Islam or paid the jizya tax for not converting, and put in office someone with a Muslim background sympathetic to Muslims. Oh... we already did some of that, didn't we?
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      Remember, our Dear Leader did say that an imam's call to prayer was "the most beautiful music that he has ever heard."
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      • Posted by Mamaemma 7 years ago
        Amazing how many people didn't hear that.
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        • Posted by 7 years ago
          Yes; and I am amazed in general how people are ignoring his clear and unambiguous statements about their own destruction. The stupidity of his followers is mind boggling. I refuse to believe that none of them have brains, which leaves one to think that there are millions of people here who truly hate their country.
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          • Posted by Mamaemma 7 years ago
            There are millions of moochers and looters. And the government is making it so that a large percentage of working Americans can no longer survive without handouts, thereby making them into involuntary moochers. And us producers just have to work harder for less
            Edit:sp
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            • Posted by 7 years ago
              I no longer consider old standards and morals of importance. Do what you need to survive, but do all you can not to enrich the government or anything associated with it. That is, in fact, my patriotic duty now.
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  • Posted by $ blarman 7 years ago
    Your assumption, however, is that the FBI is allowed to operate objectively. As we have seen with this President, however, all law-enforcement is to be handled _sub_jectively with certain ideological constraints placed on investigation and even prejudices built in to the outcomes.
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      After two decades of subjective non-thinking (remember, it was Bush who labeled Islam as "the religion of peace") and weeding out anyone capable of thinking, what do you think is left there?
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  • Posted by Herb7734 7 years ago
    In order to be PC, our FBI and CIA go around acting like a bunch of dunderheads. I think that one or both of them should be designated as "The P.C. Police" and stop this sham of them pretending to be the FBI or CIA. It has been reported that J. Edgar Hoover was spinning in his grave so fast the friction set his tomb on fire.
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  • Posted by $ MichaelAarethun 7 years ago
    I want to have my screw driver arrested for stripping the little slots in the end of the screw.

    Postive thinkers as you may recall from the pre 1992 days in Russia learned English, negative thinkers learned Chinese. Practical thinkers learned shooting. Marksmanship was practically speaking sometimes spelled with an x.

    Directorate of Internal State Security, the new protective echelon has the initials Diss.A convenient Acronym for disrespect. Citizens, Constitution etc etc etc.

    Still got that warm fuzzy protected feeling we were promised:?
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      I used to think that half of the people in the U.S. are normal and half are screwed up. It's worse than that - only a small percentage are normal and the majority are simply cattle. They'll walk off the cliff if told so by the authorities.
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      • Posted by $ Olduglycarl 7 years ago
        I used to think as you do now but soon realized that many are just making their way through life, which has gotten a lot more difficult; but they are aware, just not engaged, it's too painful, they must concentrate on family. I get that, I respect that. Not everyone is willing to stick their necks out. I think if push comes to shove, they'll surprise us. I meet at least 1000 people a week and we talk in passing...they know how bad it is. I don't mind sticking up for them, I lived there once but I am a rebel at heart and never listened to rulers but chose mentors. I chose to write about stupid and make self evident suggestions based upon my research and integrations. If push comes to shove the vast majority Will come together in community and consensus, I am sure of that now.
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        • Posted by 7 years ago
          Although it is debatable whether our votes matter or not, it is undeniable that millions get excited about candidates that represent nothing more than incompetence at best, if not pure evil. What kind of mental deficiency makes them do that? Are they really that stupid and devious at the same time to believe that Hussein or Hillary will steal more and give them some?

          I work for the DoD and know that most people there realize that we are destroying ourselves. Yet the management invariably follows all orders from Washington to cause the self-destruction and the rank and file quietly submit. This is marching in-step into an abyss.
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