Escape Plan
Posted by Itheliving 12 years ago to Movies
Escape Plan / Rated R for violence, language and close up’s of old people
Escape Plan stars Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger. They were born 24 days apart in 1947. This makes them 67 year old action stars. I am a 66 year old writer. You tell me who is in the right job. EP is a story about prison escape. SS plays a brilliant guy who works for a freelance business in which he gets thrown into perfect prisons and then breaks out in order to point out the problems with the system. In fact he has written the text book on the subject.
After an opening sequence in which he shows how tough and smart he is he agrees to go into the best ever big number one absolutely positively and completely entirely escape proof prison. Here he runs into AS who is really big and tough but can’t figure a way out. Since the inmates don’t appear to be capable of getting out of the back of a two door car it‘s puzzling why they would go to all this trouble to keep them locked up. Just put them in the backseats of two door cars at an auto junkyard and that should do it. Except for SS. He would get out.
Once in the “joint” SS promises to help AS escape. They have other problems. The welcoming cart which drops off their cell goodie pack has inadvertently left out Grecian Formula, Metamucil, Depends and Poli Grip. They don’t have TV so no reruns of Dragnet, One Adam 12 and The Mary Tyler Moore Show all known to be inmate favorites. The prison food sucks, the toilets are cold stainless steel and there is no bingo. Only actor Jim Caviezel who is the warden and a bunch of guards in robot looking costumes are there to provide any fun. The fun consists of getting beat up and tazered. “Everybody Loves a Saturday Night.” They do not sing this song as there is no way to tell which night is Saturday.
Betrayals, twists and turns galore and lots of bright lights make things move right along. Actor Sam Neill plays the sympathetic Doc whose job causes him to struggle with his conscious while stitching up wounds and handing out aspirin.
Turns out the prison is in a very unusual location. Also surprising is that EP turns out to be reasonably entertaining. It just goes to show you that you can’t keep a retirement age action star down. Except during nap time.
Rated 2.9 out of 4.0 Alcatrazes
Escape Plan stars Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger. They were born 24 days apart in 1947. This makes them 67 year old action stars. I am a 66 year old writer. You tell me who is in the right job. EP is a story about prison escape. SS plays a brilliant guy who works for a freelance business in which he gets thrown into perfect prisons and then breaks out in order to point out the problems with the system. In fact he has written the text book on the subject.
After an opening sequence in which he shows how tough and smart he is he agrees to go into the best ever big number one absolutely positively and completely entirely escape proof prison. Here he runs into AS who is really big and tough but can’t figure a way out. Since the inmates don’t appear to be capable of getting out of the back of a two door car it‘s puzzling why they would go to all this trouble to keep them locked up. Just put them in the backseats of two door cars at an auto junkyard and that should do it. Except for SS. He would get out.
Once in the “joint” SS promises to help AS escape. They have other problems. The welcoming cart which drops off their cell goodie pack has inadvertently left out Grecian Formula, Metamucil, Depends and Poli Grip. They don’t have TV so no reruns of Dragnet, One Adam 12 and The Mary Tyler Moore Show all known to be inmate favorites. The prison food sucks, the toilets are cold stainless steel and there is no bingo. Only actor Jim Caviezel who is the warden and a bunch of guards in robot looking costumes are there to provide any fun. The fun consists of getting beat up and tazered. “Everybody Loves a Saturday Night.” They do not sing this song as there is no way to tell which night is Saturday.
Betrayals, twists and turns galore and lots of bright lights make things move right along. Actor Sam Neill plays the sympathetic Doc whose job causes him to struggle with his conscious while stitching up wounds and handing out aspirin.
Turns out the prison is in a very unusual location. Also surprising is that EP turns out to be reasonably entertaining. It just goes to show you that you can’t keep a retirement age action star down. Except during nap time.
Rated 2.9 out of 4.0 Alcatrazes
All Comments
- 1Posted by Snoogoo 12 years agohaha, rated R for close ups of old people, too funny| Permalink
