Qualifiers

Posted by Mamaemma 7 years ago to Culture
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I was reading a post of Johnpe1, and he ended it with IMHO. I recognized what he was doing as I have done it a lot in my life. I call it putting qualifiers into anything I say to other people.
Some examples of qualifiers:
IMHO
Well, I may be wrong, but I think.....
I don't mean to disagree with you, but ......

My point is that in my life I have dealt with a lot of jealousy and resentment from other people, and I have tried very hard to deflect it or try to make the other person see that I am a person, too, you don't need to be jealous of me.
The hate inspired by jealousy has been a recurring theme in my life, and I wonder if any other Gulchers have encountered this. Could you tell me if this has happened to you, how it has affected you, and how you have dealt with it?
Recently a person who has fixated on me attacked me through attacking my child, and it has caused me a lot of anxiety and pain, even though in the end my child was able to overcome the considerable obstacles he put in her path in order to hurt me.
I am curious to know if jealousy is something other Gulchers have had to deal with.
And by the way, John, your opinion should be anything but humble. Your comments are intelligent and interesting and often fun.


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  • Posted by $ jlc 7 years ago
    Repeat after me: "I am >3SD from the human norm. No one will want to sit next to me at the lunch table."

    This question has some bearing on the recent discussion of the Geller Cartoon Contest, where people were falling all over each other to be 'more politically correct than thou'. Give it up, Mammaemma: You are not going to be liked/appreciated/respected or - most importantly of all - Understood by the people around you.

    The key is to not let it cause you anxiety and pain. Old Norse had a neat word: "nithing". It is the personal form of "nothing", so a nithing is a 'nothing person'. You are surrounded by nithings. They will patronize you, yell at you, strike at your weak spots (your child). You typically cannot stop them without compromising your own philosophy (eg stepping down to their level). You have to know in your own heart that they are irrelevant.

    Steven Pinker in his recent book on writing "The Sense of Style:" recommends eliminating qualifiers from general communication. He points out that people who hear/read what you say with good intention are perfectly capable of inserting "In my opinion" or "To the best of my knowledge" on their own...and people who have ill intent will ignore those qualifiers and attack you anyway. I am trying to do this with my writing, though ample knowledge of my own fallibility makes me hesitate.

    Jan, saved by arrogance
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      I have decided if the nithing who went after my daughter tries to speak tomorrow at the graduation, I will say "I'm sorry, I can't remember your name" and then walk away. That's my version of "but I don't think of you".
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      • Posted by plusaf 7 years ago
        In the grand old days of the est Training, one of the mantras was "Thank you for sharing that..."

        After a while, its use became similar to your 'I can't remember your name' message... :)

        If you use either phrase, the best next thing to do is the 'walk away' part!
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      • Posted by $ jlc 7 years ago
        That is a great thing to say! I do not know what that person did, but I congratulate you and your daughter on emerging victorious.

        Grind the nithing under your metaphorical heel.

        Jan
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  • Posted by $ Technocracy 7 years ago
    I bet that most people that found their way here have experienced this.

    People that are governed by feelings rather than reason react to others emotionally. It is the way they function.

    A substantial fraction of the populace does not like making decisions. Are not equipped to make "good" decisions. And are afraid of both situations that require decisions or decisive action, and react negatively to anyone not suffering those issues.

    Jealousy and resentment are the most common negative reactions you get when not impacting them directly. A direct conflict gives you anger as a reaction.

    My reaction to these people is pretty simple. First, as a someone that grew up in the deep south politeness was inculcated in me from a young age. So I'm as polite to them as their actions allow me to be.

    I have a very short list of people whose opinion actually matters to me. These people without a doubt are not on that list, so the Roark option is the one I exercise when not in a direct encounter with them.

    Not only do their opinions not matter to me, I cannot allow them to matter.
    If I do allow their feelings to matter, I undermine my own reasoning process.
    My responsibility is to myself and those about whom I care, not everyone else.
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    • Posted by $ blarman 7 years ago
      "Not only do their opinions not matter to me, I cannot allow them to matter."

      If we are concerned about the truth more than we are concerned about the approval of others, we'll have not only positive discussions, but seek for true answers. If on the other hand we subject ourselves to the whim and pleasure of popular opinion, any sense of principle must fly out the window.
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  • Posted by Maritimus 7 years ago
    Hello, Mamaemma,

    After reading your post, I ended up wondering whether you were describing an envious person rather than a jealous one.

    I copied definitions from Wikipedia:

    Jealousy is an emotion, and the word typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something of great personal value, particularly in reference to a human connection.

    Envy (from Latin invidia) is an emotion which "occurs when a person lacks another's superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it".

    Which do you think you were facing? Just curious.
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    • Posted by $ blarman 7 years ago
      And both are aspects of comparison: one human being against another and who is "better".

      Concentrate on the truth - not another's perceived shortcomings or excellence because you'll never see the whole story of them. It's the "grass is always greener" fable.
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      • Posted by Maritimus 7 years ago
        I think that you are missing the point: jealousy and envy are emotions, As such, entirely subjective. They are not "aspects" of a rational and objective "comparison".

        "Grass is always greener" is not a "fable". It is an irrational expression of envy. The definition of fable, from Wikipedia, is below.

        Fable is a literary genre: a succinct fictional story, in prose or verse, that features animals, mythical creatures, plants, inanimate objects, or forces of nature that are anthropomorphized (given human qualities, such as verbal communication) and that illustrates or leads to an interpretation of a moral lesson (a "moral"), which may at the end be added explicitly as a pithy maxim.

        Sorry to disagree, but A must be A here.
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        • Posted by $ blarman 7 years ago
          No need to qualify your response with an apology ;)

          I can't quite agree, however. Anything which is subjective in nature _requires_ a value judgment to take place as a precondition of anything else. Jealousy and Envy are emotional _results_ of the perception of a value judgment originating in the mind of the observer as a comparison of two states which finds disparate outcomes where one was expecting similar or identical ones, and where there is a perception that the disparate outcome negatively and irrationally impacts the observer. The inherent fallacy in envy and jealousy are in the expectation that the two compared states _should_ be equivalent in the first place or that there is any real disparate impact on the observer at all!

          One does not get jealous that a plant exists. One gets jealous that one's neighbor has a plant of a particular nature one finds desirable and which we irrationally conclude should exist in our yard by no power other than our own will. Theft occurs when rather than seek out and work to purchase a similar plant, we take our neighbor's plant.

          As for the fable, I stand corrected. I should have used the word "fallacy" rather than "fable". I meant it to emphasize your exact point: that it is an illustration of actions resulting from the influence of envy.
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    • Posted by khalling 7 years ago
      wow. I did not know that distinction. I'm always learning something from you, martimus. interesting. now I have to chew on that. huh
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      • Posted by Maritimus 7 years ago
        Hello, my dear K,

        Thank you for the compliment,

        I like very much to reduce to simple, even when there is a risk in doing it.

        Jealousy: desire to keep secure one's private property.

        Envy: desire to appropriate someone else's private property.

        Being territorial and somewhat rational animals, I think that it is rooted back many tens of thousands of years in our history, i.e. to our origins.

        Despite the criticism of qualifiers: just my opinion. Which means that I "modestly" claim no higher authority for the view expressed. Also, a promise that I did not violate anybody's copyright by omitting the reference to what actually is a quote and not my idea.

        How is THAT for a defense of qualifiers?

        Stay well. I assume that you enjoyed camping.
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  • Posted by ObjectiveAnalyst 7 years ago
    Hello Mamaemma,
    It is human nature and sometimes appropriate when one is unsure of facts to use qualifiers. However, if one is confident fear not and hold your ground until reason and new information dictate otherwise..
    I have been moved by your experience and that of others described here. I too have stories. It is an unfortunate part of dealing with some in society. I have no doubt many, if not all here, have had to deal with this occasionally. In this world a producer is a threat to moochers, and looters. We that produce are their targets and the focus of their envy. Wear it as a badge of honor.

    "The worst guilt is to accept an unearned guilt." And: "There are two sides to every issue: one side is right and the other is wrong, but the middle is always evil."
    Ayn Rand

    With great respect and admiration,
    O.A.
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      "We that produce are their targets". Very true words. Next time I am attacked I will think of it as a badge of honor. One thing for sure is that the looters and moochers and lowlifes can spot us every time, even if we are trying to blend in, so I am just myself now.
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  • Posted by kevinw 7 years ago
    I have found that using qualifiers is a habit left over from my past when I could never be sure about anything that I said and if someone became offended I felt that I had to blame myself. It was a way to appease anyone who might disagree with me and avoid confrontation. I mean, who is to say who is right or wrong, right? (right out of an Ayn Rand book) I did hear the words "you just have to be right, don't you" often but it was my own lack of confidence in speaking and in action that led me into situations where I had to defend myself over something I knew but didn't know why I knew or how to defend it properly. Confidence in my knowledge has helped eliminate those situations and/or given me the tools to handle them. My confidence has also helped to remove those people from my life whom I would still have to defend myself from.

    I still have to work to avoid using qualifiers when commenting on this site. It's a tough habit to break but I figure if someone on here disagrees with me they will tell me so and we can have that debate. I am either wrong or right but both of us will have to defend our position till we find out. If we can't have that debate then one of us doesn't belong here. Sometimes I still use qualifiers if I am not sure that I fully understand what someone means in their post or comments.

    Sorry to hear that your daughter was used that way. It is a cowards tactic. It is a statement to the strength of your character that they are afraid to come at you directly. Hopefully your daughter will come away from it stronger than even her mother.
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    • Posted by khalling 7 years ago
      Wow. Lots og good stuff there kevin. I especially agree about gaining knowledge builds confidence. I also think studying common tactics used by people to control group think is invaluable. I wish I had it all in one article or list so I could refer to it often.
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      • Posted by kevinw 7 years ago
        Thank you K. I did learn a lot about how to recognize the tactics people use by studying Objectivism. I have always had an aversion to being manipulated but was never able to see it happening until it was done. Then I would get angry, at myself and therefore the world in general. I'm still a sucker sometimes, but at least I'm not the mark I once was.
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        • Posted by khalling 7 years ago
          Objectivists tend to be-as they usually are more literal and not cynical. They see the best in people. I am always shocked when confronted with the worst in people. The brain dead-well that's a whole other story :)
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  • Posted by nln1219 7 years ago
    All the time. I often get hit with people who hate religion. To me I wish people would look at religion as merely only one path to one's higher Karma, Deity, whatever. And Religion in and of itself has so many flaws, and people often confuse faith in a higher being with religion. I myself am a devout cradle to grave Anglican. We think of the story of creation as a metaphor for the Big Bang. Science is deeply woven into scripture, if you do not take scripture verbatim in todays world. You have to take in the history of the time that the scripture was written, and then re-apply it's meaning as it would be in todays world. Taking in science is a must in faith. It is a glorious and Integral part of it. And yet I will get blasted by both sides of fence. I take the good with the bad, and say alright then to both. If they agree that's lovely. If not...it's their opinion and they are entitled to it...I just agree to disagree. Either way,,, spewing hatred to someone does not help anyone. As the old saying says "The higher the Monkey climbs the tree the more you see his ass". It always pays to be nice!
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    • Posted by $ allosaur 7 years ago
      You and I could have a great conversation.
      I'm a Big Bang Jesus is the door do no harm guy.
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      • Posted by nln1219 7 years ago
        I look at it this way...God is the BIG BANG. He/she whatever created the scientific & mathematical laws and does not change them. A = A and B =B.
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        • Posted by $ allosaur 7 years ago
          I view the Big Bang as the miracle of something coming from nothing.
          Therefore, God.
          I recall someone arguing here something coming from nothing as some sort of unexplained physical science mystery..
          Gave the argument some thought since,
          I've come to the conclusion that my previous conclusion solves the argument.
          To wit, God.
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          • Posted by coaldigger 7 years ago
            Interesting that the theory of creation would come up in this topic but I will bite. If space is curved and time is the fourth dimension, why was there ever a time when there was nothing? Any explosions moving matter in time and space would not be creation, just repositioning. With infinite time, why wouldn't every possible combination of atomic matter occur? Aren't we fortunate to exist in a state of evolution where we can wonder about all this?
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            • Posted by $ blarman 7 years ago
              Actually, if you do your physics study, time didn't exist before the Big Bang either.

              What is time really? It is the perception of change from one point to another. Without anything to be subject to change, time doesn't exist. You have to have agents (something that can act on something else) in order to create time in the first place. So what you can really postulate is that the Big Bang coincided (I'm not quite going to use the word causality) with an "explosion" of agents - not just matter.
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          • Posted by Maritimus 7 years ago
            Are you aware that the Big Bang theory is being questioned in recent research?
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            • Posted by $ allosaur 7 years ago
              Yes, over the last couple of months or so.
              If so, it doesn't shake my faith.
              Something can't come from nothing unless God wants it to.
              I don't care how convoluted someone wants to warp or wormhole science.
              I wasn't going to bother to respond but you asked me a direct question.
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              • Posted by $ puzzlelady 7 years ago
                "To wit, God." "...unless God wants it to."
                So you've chosen to introduce a wildcard, namely God, to stand for the as yet unexplained. You're making A + X = A to comfort you in the face of uncertainty and the unknown.

                Faith is the volitional disconnect from reality, a self-sabotage of the mind. Religious people compartmentalize this irrational part of their thinking or they wouldn't be able to function in the real world.

                Minds are amazing machines. They can conceive of explanations of the most imaginative kinds, creating patterns and continuums of possibilities, of speculative causalities and infinite regress, loopy logic and Rube Goldberg connections, in the pursuit of understanding existence. What would be useful is to learn, as children should, the difference between the real and the make-believe.
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  • Posted by richrobinson 7 years ago
    Great post mamaemma. My father had a business partner many years ago. She was the most disgusting person we have ever had to deal with. After buying her out of the business we had to rent our building from her for 10 years before she would sell it. When we first took over she began calling her lawyer and coming up with crazy things to accuse us of. She knew money was tight and she was trying to bankrupt us by running up our legal costs. She wanted it to look like we couldn't run the business with out her. One of the main reasons I wish I had read Atlas Shrugged much earlier in life.
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      Rich, I had a former business partner who did his best to destroy me, even calling patients and telling them I was incompetent. I know because the patients told me. He could not stand the thought that I was succeeding without him. And here's the kicker- he was my father.
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      • Posted by richrobinson 7 years ago
        Wow. That is hard to believe. He should have been the one who was the proudest of your success.
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        • Posted by 7 years ago
          Absolutely, but that is assuming he had the normal feelings of a father. But he didn't. I spent a lot of years trying to get his approval and even screwed up my life in some ways. I am very grateful and proud that I finally saw him for what he was, and now have a wonderful family of my own. I learned a lot from him, and if I feel hate toward anyone, he is right up there on my list! He earned it.
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      I think I have realized that no matter how many qualifiers I use, there are going to be people who hate and are jealous, and those emotions are very strong. Your fathers former partner is a perfect example. It sounds like her hate led her to do illogical things which cost and hurt her as well as you. But hate must be served! You won in the end, but her vindictiveness caused you much disruption I am sure. See, I am not alone.
      Isn't it amazing that being successful brings such ire upon us? Whereas I love seeing success in others.
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  • Posted by coaldigger 7 years ago
    I have had trouble with this all my life. I realize the problem is me but I don't think I can/will do much about it. The problem is: I have an opinion on just about every subject that I formed by research and reason. I am passionate about what I believe. When I was young, I stuttered and as I learned how to overcome it, I deleted unnecessary phrases from my speech. I also lack empathy and have no clue what may upset someone else when it would not upset me. If I want to discuss something I really don't know a lot about I may just pick a side and try to defend it. When logic overwhelms my assumed position, I am more than willing to acquiesce but by then the other side may be irate. I know all this is true because my wife of 52 years has told me a million times.
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      Thanks for the comment, coaldigger. Now I'm going to tell you what I see, with no qualifiers. I see a man with strong opinions formed by a reasoning mind. Your comments are always intelligent and thought-provoking. I have a lot of respect for the individual your comments reveal.
      And you have just made my point when you say the fault is yours. That is the socialization that made Rearden feel guilty. I am so glad that you express your true self here.
      And I don't think you lack empathy; your comment made me feel better!
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  • Posted by $ puzzlelady 7 years ago
    Emotions per se are not bad. They are value judgments, and based on an individual's internalized premises, they can be enjoyable and objective. I objectively feel bad for your awful experience from a vindictive miscreant, Mamaemma, and feel good that you and your daughter have overcome it. Empathy is part of our toolkit for understanding context and interactions with others.

    What I have observed from decades of being a "meme hunter" and Martian anthropologist is that qualifiers are used by both kindhearted and cretinous individuals. As children we were taught to be humble, not show off, not incite others' resentment, not be proud or arrogant, to "neither look too good nor talk too wise". As grown-ups we are expected to be self-effacing, apologetic for our very existence, brown-nosing to higher-ups and respectful where respect is not merited. Disgusting, isn't it?

    There's nothing wrong with being considerate, thoughtful, courteous, friendly, solicitous, compassionate where merited and reciprocated. It is the social glue, the relational lubricant, for living among other humans. Deliberate rudeness and indifference just beget more of that and make for a cold, hard, unpleasant atmosphere. Someone has to make the first move back toward benevolence without self-deprecation.

    Defensive qualifiers serve as cushions to soften the blow when conflicting ideas collide. They serve to get a foot in the door before resistance breaks out. Salesmen use them to soften up a prospect. They are a form of insincerity that I can spot a mile away. They are also a sign of someone not sure of himself, who proceeds tentatively so as not to arouse disapproval. Sad to say, the world runs on popularity contests, rendering people into schemers and deceivers, poseurs and bullies, sycophants and schmoozers. The best way I have found of coping is not to associate with such people.

    It was one of Ayn Rand's most powerful insights that one should not live for the approval of others, even though as children we are conditioned to do so, to win nods from parents, teachers, adults and friends. It is a vicious device for social control. Ultimately, though, it is our own approval, by our own rational standards, that is the only thing that counts.

    Thank you for your frank and open comments. You are individuals I would be honored to call friends.
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  • Posted by Herb7734 7 years ago
    When my son and I were in publishing, we came up with a new concept which zoomed us into the upper echelons of the genre we were involved in. And unlike negative predictions, we stayed there. For some reason this engendered hatred by several other publishers who wrote really nasty stuff about us in trade magazines and other media. My son, being more hot-headed than me, wrote scathing rebuts and we were at war.. I just didn't get it. When I talked the situation over with my wife and son, the wife said, "Forget it, they're just jealous." She was right, of course. It was just that son and me couldn't conceive of such hatred over the success of a competitor. It was the end of our expecting applause for our success and proceeding by not giving a damn about what others said, as long as the public liked our product.
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      Herb, you have my applause and admiration for your success.
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      • Posted by Herb7734 7 years ago
        I guess we were naïve to think that others thought like us. It actually started a war within the business with creators lining up on either their side or ours, until we got smart and did the "But I don't think of you Mr. Toohey." and made sure everyone knew it. It didn't end the criticisms, but it did end the war.
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  • Posted by gcarl615 7 years ago
    After spending most of my life being " sensitive" to other people disagreeing with me and avoiding verbal conflict, I realized I got this very bad habit from my parents. It is not the only submissive habit I got from them. It took me a very long time to get past most of the silly " just get along" ideas they imbedded in me. Once I realized how my upbringing had impeded me, me became a new person.
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  • Posted by wiggys 7 years ago
    Mama,
    based upon my readings of Ayn Rand I decide a long time ago to view these type of attacks the way a duck views water. just let it run down your back and wonder why you are so important to someone that they find it necessary to attack you. after you wonder for a minute or so, just get on with your life.
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    • Posted by 7 years ago
      I couldn't agree more, wiggys, and 99% of the time I have been able to ignore these people, although, as you say, I wonder why they are so full of hate. But I will admit this guy attacking my child and trying to end the career she has fought so hard for got my attention.
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  • Posted by blackswan 7 years ago
    As Joe Friday said, "just the facts, ma'am." If you stick to the facts, you don't need to add a qualifier; it makes you appear unsure of the facts, and weakens your argument. So, it's not your opinion, it's the facts. If the other person can't handle the truth, then we're done here.
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  • Posted by strugatsky 7 years ago
    I should add that there really are two types of qualifiers. The discussion here covers the type that is added to people's opinions, viewpoints and moral stands. I agree that qualifiers in those cases should not exist. One either believes in something, or does not. If one is not sure, then perhaps keeping the mouth shut and learning is the best action.
    However, it is another case completely to use qualifiers when discussing technical matters. There, it is not a matter of one's moral fiber, but technical knowledge, which is, almost by definition, never complete. Thus, predicating one's position with "in my opinion," for example, is just good manners.
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  • Posted by $ MichaelAarethun 7 years ago
    Do you think or do you believe? The phrase I think has some uses. It is intended to convey and impression of intellectual ability deserved or not, It's also a convenient cop out akin to ''Good Try,''

    I believe is a used by people who stand behind what they thought, came to a conclusion, and will back it up with straight on statements not waffling and changing definitions every five minutes.

    I make a point of deleting by the way and as it so happens along with other qualifiers mentioned and going out of my way to mak a well deserved joke out of Political C-Rap,

    Especially when it seeks to replace a sexist word with one even more sexist. term.

    To put a light on the candle on the frosting on the cake you can and may have great fun watching the stunned look on the faces of those who thought "I think" was some sort of protective shield. I thoroughly believe such moments are the highlight of my life.

    Think about it and you will soon understand those sorts of persons are not welcome at your lunch table.Too many that are worth while to waste table space.

    Jealous? Let me think about that. I'll get back to you. There are some Galtists waiting to order a meal.
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    • Posted by $ MichaelAarethun 7 years ago
      I thought that might set off a discussion and believed it to be true. All of that presented should make up a concise list on the importance of language. I tried to teach young Lieutenants that but mostly ended up waiting until their fifteen minutes was up then became Platoon Leader again. thanks for the input on that.
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    • Posted by strugatsky 7 years ago
      My take on the words "think" and "believe" are the opposite. To me, "think" is the result of logical evaluation of facts; "believe" is a strict adherence to a dogma.
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      • Posted by Maritimus 7 years ago
        I think that "to believe" means to be persuaded of the truth of something by reasoning. Whether that something is objectively true, does not matter. As we all know, innumerable people have had extremely strong beliefs in objective falsehoods throughout millennia.
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        • Posted by $ puzzlelady 7 years ago
          Belief is not based on reasoning; it comes from rationalization. And rationalization is the mental and emotional gymnastics to justify something without evidence. Objective truth does matter.
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  • Posted by $ Abaco 7 years ago
    Mamaemma, I can relate.

    There are some very miserable people in this world. They are often very deeply upset by something in their own lives (be it their weight, face, something from their childhood, poor financial decisions, etc). Many get through these challenges ok, but some are damaged. I think those are they types you are talking about.

    Yes, I've experienced it several times in my life. I've gotten very good at identifying it now. Just in the past week I had a guy I've known for over 20 years put words in my mouth and imply that I said I'd beat my kids. I know why he said it. In his mind, I was winning an argument. We are in different paradigms. What's a mild disagreement to me is a no-holds-barred fight to him. He must win everything because he probably thinks, deep down, that he's a loser. Not my problem anymore. More than anything, it made me sad, not angry. Sad for him.

    The internet has been a real boon for cowards and angry people. They can insult and say things they'd never say to somebody's face. I grow tired of some of the stuff I've seen as a result. I think the internet, while I love it, has caused our society to become a lot more callous.

    For me...I still love people. Especially children. They aren't f*7cked up yet, usually. But, I keep a very small, very tight group of friends and that's about it. If you're in my circle, I've got your back. If I see any signs of pettiness, you're out. I just no longer have the energy to even get pissed about it - haha...
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    • Posted by Maritimus 7 years ago
      Hello, Abaco,

      I regret it, but I have to disagree with you on one point. You wrote: "The internet has been a real boon for cowards and angry people. They can insult and say things they'd never say to somebody's face. I grow tired of some of the stuff I've seen as a result. I think the internet, while I love it, has caused our society to become a lot more callous."

      I believe that you are inverting the cause and the effect. Internet has just made common emotions (cowardice, anger, pettiness etc.) much more public. If you believe that human nature is fundamentally moral (morality based on rational self-interest) you have to accept that publicizing poor behavior will eventually generate a counter pressure generated from negative reactions that such outbursts. But, we must not give up. We must, always politely, point out the misdeeds. Even most bullies can be shamed. But we, ourselves, have to behave so that the perpetrators of misdeeds cannot avoid respecting us, even if they will do their best to hide it. They must know, always, that before them stands a lady or a gentleman.

      Another comment. I love children too. I think that way too many are emotionally traumatized by less than loving or absent parents. Now, in the third generation after the 1960 "liberating revolution" the frequency of traumatization in childhood is still increasing, I think. We have our task cut out, don't we?

      Just my opinions.

      All the best.
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      • Posted by $ Abaco 7 years ago
        I appreciate your comment. I understand where you're coming from. But, this is where I depart from your logic. "If you believe that human nature is fundamentally moral (morality based on rational self-interest) you have to accept that publicizing poor behavior will eventually generate a counter pressure generated from negative reactions that such outbursts. But, we must not give up. We must, always politely, point out the misdeeds." I just don't believe these things. I no longer want to be tasked with pointing out the misdeeds of angry cowards. I'm retired from that activity...gone Galt, you could say. And, the internet does exactly that - publicize bad behavior. I see little to no resulting back pressure. But, you may be right regarding cause/effect.

        Happy Friday
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  • Posted by CircuitGuy 7 years ago
    My IB high school taught me not to use qualifiers, but I try to do it, esp in writing, b/c otherwise people may think I'm not open to other ideas or that I'm just being rude.
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  • Posted by Owlsrayne 7 years ago
    Jealousy, is not pat of my thinking or vocabulary. I love to debate the issues at times or type out an idea. I don't understand in this day in age that emotion should come into play unless one is predisposed to such dangerous twisted sociological emotions or aberant psychological fixation.
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