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Whatever happened to, "Hey I have some apples. Would you like to buy them?"

Posted by sdesapio 8 years, 8 months ago to Humor
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Whatever happened to,

"Hey I have some apples. Would you like to buy them?"

"Yes! Thank you!"

That's as complicated as it should be to open a business in this country.

- Ron Swanson
SOURCE URL: http://i.imgur.com/V659cro.jpg


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    Posted by robgambrill 8 years, 8 months ago
    I can hear the opposition now...

    "Well people have to eat, and apples are food, and someone has to provide them.

    But how dare you try to exploit that situation by trying to make a buck producing apples. If people need apples, they should be Free!

    And just what are you putting on those apples anyway? Nothing? Are you trying to trick people into eating worms? Thank Goodness for the FDA!

    Oh you spray your apples? What are you trying to do, poison people with your insecticides? Thank Goodness for the EPA!

    Don't forget about those people who are allergic to apples, how do you think they feel about you producing this toxic product? We need the government to make you put warning labels on these foul fruits of your labor!

    Just because some degenerates want to eat your apples, we have to tolerate this illicit trade. SO, we might as well tax it! Let's see, we can tax your equipment as property tax, your wages as income tax, your profits as a business tax, and of course, we have to tax the apples themselves with a sales tax!

    And don't think you can sell those little red menaces across state lines buddy!
    We will tax the trucks that carry them, and the tires they roll on. Who are you to wear out our public roads hauling your little packages of death all over the place?

    If you were civic minded and had any public spirit, you would just give up the stupid idea of producing apples and live off government subsidies like normal people. Oh but not you, you are a selfish, greedy, heartless clod. What makes you think you are better than everyone else? Gee Brother, get with the program!

    There ought to be a law! There ought to be more laws, and more taxes! The president should get out his phone and his pen and shut down the greedy apple growers and make them conform! Throw them in prison if you have to and..."

    Sorry, I just finished re-reading Atlas Shrugged, the looter arguments are still ringing in my ears.
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    • Posted by $ CBJ 8 years, 8 months ago
      I can’t believe you would let the apple seller operate without requiring a thorough background check. Plus 200 hours of expensive apple selling classes to obtain a license. And of course offer a substantial discount to customers paying with food stamps.
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    • Posted by Maritimus 8 years, 8 months ago
      You forgot that the government will forbid those apples because they are genetically modified. Obscuring the fact that it took millennia to select apples (and their genes) which produce abundant fruit.
      EDIT: correcting a typo
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  • Posted by ProfChuck 8 years, 8 months ago
    A street vendor was selling apples. A customer approached him and said "I will buy half your apples plus half an apple". A second customer came up and made the same offer. Finally, a third customer bought half the remaining apples plus half an apple leaving the vendors cart empty.
    Question; How many apples did the vendor start with if he never had to cut an apple in half? And would someone that is not an objectivist even understand the problem?
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  • Posted by $ allosaur 8 years, 8 months ago
    A reincarnation of Old Dino as a fruit grower in ancient times.
    "Apples for sale Apple for--oh, crap!
    Here comes the king's men. Hide the good stuff!"
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  • Posted by term2 8 years, 8 months ago
    In Las Vegas we are forbidden from opening ANY business UNTIL it's approved by the city and a license granted. The height of stupidity and control. I manufacture off road lighting and I had to sit there for an hour while they figured out what category the business fit into. And then I was supposed to wait 45 days before opening the business to allow them to check it out and inspect. Meanwhile I was supposed to put all the equipment in place and rent the space
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  • Posted by $ MichaelAarethun 8 years, 8 months ago
    It was replaced by how many of the apples are you giving me and when do you deliver? Red Delicioua Why no Fuji's? You are thinking of the USA and living in the USSA.
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