I recall 9/11, as if I could ever forget, because it was the beginning of the end of so many things in my life. It was the beginning of the failure of my IT consulting company, it was the awakening of my countrymen to the truth about the world we live in, it was beginning of the acidic cynicism in my heart that will no doubt be my eventual demise.

I awoke from my couch at the prodding of my 12 year old son. The television was on - FOX News. The cobwebs cleared to see one of the towers with a gaping gash. Debris spewing out of its wound, papers littered the sky line huge snowflakes. The news was still speculating that it may have been an accident when a second jet flew into the second tower.

My heart dropped. I wished ALL Muslims dead. Yes, I knew before they said it that Islam was responsible. I recall saying, and now regret, that "Millions of Muslims have to die to avenge what they have done" - be careful what you wish for.

As time went on I watched in horror as people leapt from the windows, preferring the fall to the fire - I can't blame them. Stunned I watched this massive World Trade Center collapsed, knowing that thousands of AMERICANS, men and women who just went to work, had died before my eyes.

Time passed. I called my children's schools - they wouldn't be going for the foreseeable future. I told my wife to take off from work - she did. My family wouldn't be leaving the house until we knew that at least the world around us was secure.

I drove to my office 3 hours late and dismissed everyone for the day - I told them to be home with their families. We didn't know what was going to happen next and I didn't expect many calls for service (how right I was). I remember sitting in my silent office and crying in anger.

My business failed as clients held tight their wallets for several months- uncertainty breeds caution, no one is to blame.

I am still angry.