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Sexy Time at the Airport

Posted by $ Abaco 9 years, 9 months ago to Culture
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So, I had to fly out on a business trip recently. I noticed that they funnel everybody through the machine that xrays your clothing. So, I assumed the surrender pose and got zapped. Then, afterward I really got groped good. My private parts were lifted and fondled. They looked down my pants, squeezed my thighs, even swabbed my hands. They even made sure there wasn't a terrorist between my buns. I felt so safe afterward! But, as I walked off with my shoes in my hand and my belt undone like I just had a tryst in the back of a cab it dawned on me, "Hey...our borders are wide open. HEY!"

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  • Posted by Dobrien 9 years, 9 months ago
    This means of surrender and patting down is all ment to teach everyone to bow to the govt's authority. That they know what is best for us
    To keep us safe and then they go and hire as many Muslims as they can at airports across the USA with a fed $25,000 bonus per hire.
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  • Posted by $ Olduglycarl 9 years, 9 months ago in reply to this comment.
    Boy, with bending over for the IRS and government groping at the airports, it seems we've arrived at a sanctioned Orgy.
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  • Posted by $ rockymountainpirate 9 years, 9 months ago
    That's exactly why I do a 2 handed bird when I go through the scanner which always results in my right knee being molested. Fortunately the last few flights have been pre-check.
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  • Posted by CircuitGuy 9 years, 9 months ago
    When I was 26, right after the Sept 11 attacks a pretty woman my age was alone screening me, and the detector kept going off on my zipper. She had to pat down my zipper. She appeared uncomfortable with it. It remember it b/c I was simultaneous concerned with this level of paranoia and intrusiveness, uncomfortable having a stranger touch me, and perving about it a little. She quickly ushered me on through, probably without confirming there was no metal in my pants.

    The whole thing lasted only a few seconds, less than $1 worth if we consider the going rate to be $10 per 200-second song. lol. I laugh about it, but it marks in my mind the 90s coming to an end. Technology was going to end war and make us all rich. That dream came apart fast.
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  • Posted by freedomforall 9 years, 9 months ago
    Closed borders would mean no fun at the airport ;^(
    (Yes, thats a dream to replace the current nightmare.)
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