FBI Adds Itself To FBI Watch List

Posted by $ allosaur 1 year, 1 month ago to Humor
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In a move unprecedented yet emergency level necessary to protect the safety and security of millions of Americans, the FBI has added itself to the FBI watch list.
"Due to the vast number of pedophiles, insurrectionists, framers, frauds, blackmailers and killers in our organization," said FBI Director Christopher Wray, "we decided that the FBI needs to keep a close eye on the FBI before the FBI does something terrible."
But oh the horror for the status quo. Congressional career politician crime ringleaders such as Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi expressed concern this may hamper the FBI's ability to organize governor kidnapping schemes, insurrections such as Jan. 6 and mass shootings.
"Without the FBI, we may have to turn to traditional partners in crime such as the Mafia to fight our political enemies," said one anonymous Washington pencil-necked Schiffhead with popping out eyes. "What are we coming to? A banana republic?"
Hey, don't worry, folks! Problem solved!
Acting like George Soros bought and paid for prosecutors, the FBI just announced arresting itself and then releasing itself from custody a few minutes later.
"We're ba-ack!" Wray triumphantly sang. "We're from the government and we are here to help you."
SOURCE URL: https://babylonbee.com/news/fbi-adds-itself-to-fbi-watch-list?mc_cid=d25a6b8786&mc_eid=5af0f3f340

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  • Posted by 25n56il4 1 year, 1 month ago
    You donkey! I read less than ten words and then I said, 'What' and saw it was 'Humor". Thank Heaven. N
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    • Posted by $ 1 year, 1 month ago
      In me dino's defense, all I can say is "Hee-haw!"
      Watch your step when you see the allosaur moniker. When I was a dinosaur-loving kid, I read that Allosaurus was an ambush predator.
      But the last thing I read is that they hunted in packs like a pride of lions. I don't think anyone knows allosaurs really did besides being built to eat meat.
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      • Posted by 25n56il4 1 year, 1 month ago
        Well, it was a funny article in any case. I got a laugh when I needed one. Thanks
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        • Posted by $ 1 year, 1 month ago
          Thank you for letting me know I succeeded at least in your case. Besides long being a lover of satire, me the dino believes too much gloom and doom is bad for both one's psyche and general overall health.
          Also good is achieving a mental balance by being able to poke fun at those who would inflict such twisted negativity to gain control over others.
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