This issue of The Babylon Bee features born racist white children being told by their worst than born racist sneaky white parents, "If they ask you for your name, just say, 'No hablo ingles.'"
In "Related Articles"~~Ever see any of the Last Behind flicks spanning twixt 2000 and 2004, the last 'un with Nicholas Cage in it? Filed away in "Strange But True" is a kid who wakes up to find all of his best Halloween candy raptured up to On High. Like discarded clothes no longer needed by "The Saved," only the candy wrappers were Left Behind.
"Yeah, that's really weird, son," the kid's dad said, unable to make eye contact.
In another "Related Article," a teen driver traveling at 78MPH glances up at the road to--oh, the horror!--to almost miss something cool on Instagram.
His parents are really glad to hear he's okay. "We love our son," the teen's mother said. "If he missed an Instagram post, we don't know what we would do."
In "Must Read"~~you must read an article entitled "15-Year-Old Boy's Soccer Team Demands Equal Pay For Beating U.S. Women's Team,"
Yeah, those non-gender high school boys demand an end to sexist/age discrimination NOW! Want Antifa in your front yard? Pay those non-gender boys equal pay RIGHT NOW!